Nurse gives healing to grieving parents

Parents who face a devastating tragedy – the loss of a newborn infant – are given a treasured memory by a nurse at Valley View Medical Center who has volunteered her time to learn the craft of creating molds of the tiny hands parents will not have the joy to hold and see grow.

Vicki Swasey learned to make molds of tiny newborn hands 10 years ago when she was a Certified Nurses Aid in Labor and Delivery at Valley View. As of May, Vicki is now an R.N. in Labor and Delivery, and has been on call, coming into the hospital at all hours, day or night, to offer parents a mold of their baby’s hands whenever there is a demise for all of those 10 years.

Annie Gibson has been a nurse in Labor and Delivery for five years and said Vicki not only does an amazing job creating beautiful molds, but always comes in as soon as they call to inform her there is a demise, and she never says no.

“She is simply amazing, and the mothers absolutely love the molds,” Gibson said, “Vicki gives a true treasure to families that help in their healing, and gives them something to hang onto when they have to go home without their baby.”

Vicki has also been called by the E.R. and even the mortuaries when tragic accidents have taken children, and parents are in need of something tangible they can take with them. After making the molds at the hospital, Vicki takes the molds home and cleans and sands them, making them look smooth and perfect. The molds are then placed under a glass dome, and the families pick them up at the hospital.

Vicki said she has never had a mother say no to her offer to create a little mold of her baby’s hands, and sometimes she will also make molds of the tiny feet as well, depending on the family’s wishes and the condition of the baby.

Kari Pickett is in her 26th year as a Labor and Delivery nurse and said when a mother does not get to take her baby home, it is the little things that give that needed bit of comfort.

“The molds are a small bit of comfort we can offer to mothers,” she said. “It’s the little personal touches that can make all the difference – little things mean a lot to people.”

All the nurses interviewed for the story including Labor and Delivery Manager Caralee Lyon said they never forget a mother they cared for who had a demise – they remember the little things they did that helped the mother in a crucial moment, like Kari moving a mother to a new bed, Annie rubbing a mother’s feet, or Caralee wrapping a mother’s stillborn baby in a warm blanket.

“As nurses we are supposed to heal or help,” Annie said. “And when all we can do is provide a hand mold of their precious baby, or give them a new bed or rub their feet or whatever they need – then that’s what we do – and just being able to offer the molds helps us as nurses do our job.”

Vicki said she has learned a lot about grief in her experiences.

Carilee said she has watched Vicki stay with a mother for hours in the E.R. when a toddler was lost to a car accident, comforting and staying with the mother, attending to whatever needs she had before making a mold of the child’s hand.

“I never have known what to say to a parent who has lost their child – I still don’t know what say, but at least I can give them something to hold onto,” Vicki said. “It helps for them to have something tangible – it makes their baby feel real – like a part of the family, and that helps.”

Vicki only performs about six molds for the hospital a year, not including requests from the mortuary or the E.R.

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